Off With a Bang and Two Balls

Welcome to all in blogging land. You may have stumbled on this blog accidentally or been pulled here by your mouse tail and wondering what to expect. This is a blog for anyone who has a body and is not too easily offended. I promise to try not to bore you but no guarantees will be given. I’m hoping you might learn a little, laugh occasionally and keep coming back for more.

I started the blog after presenting a seminar at the 2010 RWA –Romance Writers Australia conference, called “Looking After the Writer’s Body”. Only about a dozen people attended my little seminar out of, maybe two to three hundred delegates. Since I was up against a forensic scientist I wasn’t surprised at the low numbers, Hey, what's more exciting, Finding out what to do with a Dead Body or how to look after your Own Body? I know what I would have chosen but fortunately the good ladies who did attend the seminar liked my style and content and asked for more.
So here it is.
You asked for it. You got it.

I like a bit of fun with learning and don’t take life too seriously so be warned, if it is a blog that is PC, erudite, academic, or entirely evidence based that you are after, DO NOT READ ON.

Now that I have your attention… here is my first body maintenance tip as published in November RWA Hearts Talk Magazine with the amazingly catchy title of

BALL ON A WALL

Wouldn’t it be great to have your very own masseur at your beck and call to massage your aching back or ease that burn in your shoulder blades as you slog away at the computer? I wish. I’ve tried to train The Man and The Sons but none of them maintain any enthusiasm for the task beyond oh…about thirty seconds. So here’s where a few self massage techniques come in. Don’t worry. It’s not the kind of self-massage you find in a Blaze novel, although my favourite technique sounds as if it quite possibly could. It’s called ‘Ball-on-a-Wall’.
Here’s what you do.

Step 1.Grab a ball. Tennis ball size is best. You can use an actual tennis ball; the cheap ones are fine and often are a bit softer than the expensive match balls. If you can find a similar-size rubber ball, even better. I like a little squish factor in my balls (though not too squishy, some firmness is essential!)

Step 2. Find a wall. A nice smooth blank firm surface uncluttered by furniture is what you are after. Avoid brick walls, textured walls and cream-coloured walls.

Step 3. Position ball against ‘your spot’ (remember, this is not a Blaze novel). It works best around the shoulder blade area or low back.

Step 4. Lean against the wall.

Step 5. Go for it.
Rock side to side. Jiggle up and down. Do squats. Whatever works for you. Your body weight and the pressure of the ball on the wall have a fantastic massaging effect. Moans of relief are optional.

Technique Tips
The further your feet are away from the wall, the greater the pressure.
Don’t put the ball directly over the central bony part of your spine – too uncomfortable.
Not suitable for those with osteoporosis.

How long is enough? The eternal question. Usually a few minutes, up to about ten minutes, but if you like longer that’s fine too. Your legs are likely to give out first, especially if you are using the repeated squat technique. NB the squat technique is also great for the thighs, a double benefit, two-for-the-price-of-one; a bit of leg strength along with your massage. How good is that?

How often? I find a little bit often works for me. It is also better to use self-massage as a preventative rather than wait until pain and stiffness set in.

But wait there’s more….
For the low back, i.e. lumbar area, try ‘The Double Ball Technique’. Here you simply use two balls placed either side of your spine and repeat as above. It takes a bit more coordination but is well worth mastering the skill. If you have trouble keeping your balls together and in the right place, try putting them in a stocking or stocking-sock. A knot, or a couple of knots between each ball and on either side, can keep them in position for straddling your spine. (Now I am getting some ideas for my next novel).

Words of caution (learnt by me the hard way)
Guard your balls like a pitbull. Once the kids use them to play fetch with the dog or a game of cricket in the dirt your wall will never be the same again. Especially if the wall is cream.

That’s all folks. More on self massage techniques later. Next blog may be on massage or posture. Or it might be stretches. You will have to stay tuned to find out.